Yeah, I deleted that post. The one that showed up in all of your readers and you can't access. Well, I "unpublished" it. Almost the same thing. Anyway, I did it because I was overtired/overemotional/over...drunk? maybe. But it was just a pathetic rant, the kind that you need to let out but you don't really need to let out in the open.
Things are still shitty. But I am going to be OK. Right? I mean, I am, she said, with finality and conviction.
One of my friends is a contractor, and he's charging me only an arm to put in all the flooring, not an arm and a leg. They started today. I got most of the painting done already. The appliances are going to be delivered Sunday.
Except I forgot to get a shower. Whoops. And I keep putting it off, every day I think of it. For no apparent reason. I am sure Guinny understands the whole not-understanding-this-ness of that.
I had to come back early because the wood for the floors came in to the store, and I had to get it into the apartment ASAP for it to "season" or acclimate or some shit. Anyway, it cut my weekend of me time short. I might end up doing it again next weekend; it kind of depends on how this week goes.
I am thankful for all of my friends. Without you, I would not be getting through this. With you, I am surviving.
P.S. Thinking about getting this couch. What say you, friends? I thought I'd ask you since I'm basically picking out a bed for you.
Do you mean forget to buy a shower, or forget to take a shower? At day 3ish, you start to be your own reminder of the latter...
ReplyDeleteMotherlovin' comment bomb!
ReplyDeleteOK. Done now.
ReplyDeleteReally.
I mean buy a shower. The one in there right now is wobbly and belongs in a cheap Winnebago from the 70s. IT IS JUST SO MUCH STUFF THAT HAS TO BE DONE. IT OVERWHELMS ME.
ReplyDelete*hugs!* It's ok to let things go for a while. That's why I sleep on a futon in the living room!
ReplyDeleteTo answer your question, YES, you will be OK. Plus I agree with Milissa--it is OK to let things go for a while.
ReplyDeleteLove the sofa even if I'll never get the chance to sleep on it. There is something cozy about covering up with a blanket and falling to sleep on a comfy sofa.
ReplyDeleteEven if I don't comment often, I hate that you are hurting and wish a bright future for you and your child. Sending positive vibes to you as you traverse this extremely crappy time. Here's to a shallow and small puddle of crap so you can get through it and reach solid ground soon.
Why do they name furniture for people? "Here's the Ed-Earl collection. It's 2x6s on cinderblocks in various configurations fer sittin' and TV stand and a giant spoon for a coffee table. Or we gots the Geoff; it's spelled funny so you know it's so-fisticated!"
ReplyDeleteYou ARE ok. You are better than ok. You are perfect. And things will get better.
ReplyDeleteI love that couch - I actually looked at it myself when I was couch shopping! Come to think of it, it kind of looks like the couch I did end up buying, except mine has 3 small cushions instead of 2 big ones. I'd sleep on it.
That is a good couch. It is not trying to be all "look, I'm a fancy Eero Saarinen couch that is so well designed that you can't sit on it unless you are metrosexual." It is the couch that says, "hey, you too drunk to drive home? Just curl up here. I thought I saw an afghan somewhere. Just one thing, put a bowl on the floor near you because there's only one rule to drunken couch surfing."
ReplyDeleteAlso, I have do make plans to go to Spokane in January and I thought of you even though it is still far. And covered with snow.