Monday, July 25, 2011


So although, 80% of the time, I am a bad ass motherfucker, there is at least 20% of the time that I am a mess of frayed emotions and sneaky self-hate spirals and general bitch-and-whininess. I am telling you this because when I get sick, the penudulum swings to the opposite end of the one I'm usually occupying, and ALL I CAN DO is whine. Like a tiny infant.

I woke up yesterday feeling ick, and chalked it up to not-enough-sleep combined with too-much-wine. But it was my throat that was hurting, and kind of my sinuses, and my body was kind of aching. And it didn't get better all day. And I lost my appetite, and my throat got worse, and then by the time I went to bed, I was feeling like someone had beaten me severely and forced me to swallow a pineapple.

Then, as I laid in bed, I got cold. The kind of cold that was like being whipped from the inside of your skin with a cat o'nine tails made of ice. It hurt to move, but I was shivering (and therefore moving) nonstop. So I got out of bed, put on a fleece jogging suit, added two downy blankets to the bed, then huddled under my pile of clothes and covers, waiting to heat up.

Finally, about an hour in, I started getting cozily warm. It was then that my heretofore unused brain realized I probably had a fever, as it was about 75 degrees in the house, and I looked like I was sleeping outside in the tundra. So I got up, took a few ibuprofen, went back to bed.

Passed out. Thirty minutes later, I woke up to go pee, then couldn't go back to sleep because I was worried that Wal-Mart was going to sneak into our store and steal all the wine. Also, I could not stop thinking about the Rogue varietal that we had to bottle in the morning. This is when I realized I was hallucinating.

I drank some water and waited for the ibuprofen to kick in. About 20 minutes later, I started getting uncomfortably warm. I took of the blanket, then the next blanket, then shed my clothes, then finally laid there in my undies on the bed, sweating so much that I literally drenched the blanket. Gross.

Somewhere in here Dust woke up to go to work. Around 5AM I finally passed out, and slept til 9AM, when I woke up feeling like every muscle I had wanted to cry.

I am supposed to do ALL THE WORK on a grant today, and all I feel like I can do is sip tea and lie here inert. I am such a damn baby.


  1. Awww, I hate being sick, I am a HUGE baby about it. I hope you feel better soon! REST.

  2. That sounds flu-like. I mean, I'm not a doctor or anything, but it fits with my experiences of having the flu. And you're totally not a baby for sipping tea and lying inert when you have the flu AT ALL because it is AWFUL. I hope you get better soon. In the meantime, here is someone to share your misery with.


  3. Thanks, guys. The fever is gone (yay!) but now my throat feels exactly how it did when I had mono. The only thing I can swallow without alot of hurting is hot tea. I remember when I had mono, all I could eat/drink was hot water. I had a "sick cup" that I used so my roommates wouldn't catch my disease. God, this is nowhere near as bad as that. Scratch that comparison.

    Blah. But still. Brain is feeble, as evidenced by its desire to spell feeble F-E-B-I-L-E.

  4. I am glad you are feeling sort of better, Miz Febile!

    Also, Rachael, thanks for that link, that is hilarious shit right there.


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